WHAT SHOULD CORNELL CALL ME

When I’m asked about O-Week

When underclassmen try to get into bars

Monday Night at Ruloffs

When I upload a paper two minutes before the deadline

When I see a TA on campus having just skipped class

When I’m looking over composites

When people on my floor write me up for making too much noise

When/if I got tapped for a secret society

When a professor assigns extra reading

When I’m on a wine tour

Expectations:

Reality:

When I pass the swim test

How I feel about the Science requirement

When Taio Cruz played for Slope Day

How I initially responded to the news: 

How I responded to him on the day: 

How I feel the Monday after Slope Day weekend

When someone asks me if I’ve completed the PE class requirements